WWE Fast Lane Predictions

Fast Lane.png

It’s that time of month again! The time when the WWE machine rolls on to pay per view, for their final show before the granddaddy of them all, Wrestlemania 32. This year sees a lot of mid-card feuds reach their natural culmination at the Fast Lane event, which is effectively built around one major match; that being the triple threat to determine the number one contender, who goes on to face The Game, Triple H, for the WWE World Heavyweight Championship at ‘Mania.

So, who’s going to win? Let’s have a look.

 

PRE-SHOW MATCH;

U.S CHAMPIONSHIP:
(C) Alberto Del Rio  Vs  Kalisto

Alberto Del Rio Vs Kalisto

For seemingly the 4,754th time, the two biggest Mexican names in the company go head to head for the formerly prestigious U.S Championship. I said during my Rumble predictions that the company would have made a good call by holding off on Kalisto’s victory until Wrestlemania, where the moment would have been perfect for a perennial good-guy victory. They didn’t; instead pulling the trigger at the Rumble, giving Kalisto the championship early (in my eyes), and now here we are. This match has a really big ‘who cares?’ feel to it, and feels like a blow-off as opposed to the start of something bigger. Kalisto to win, unless WWE decides to give it back to Del Rio, which would make absolutely zero sense at this point.

Who I would book to win? Kalisto.

Who will win? Kalisto.

 

AJ STYLES VS CHRIS JERICHO

Aj styles vs Jericho.jpg

If there’s one thing WWE has done right in 2016, it’s the treatment of A.J Styles. Considered by many one of the greatest pure ‘rasslers’ in the world, when he signed with the big E we all held our collective breaths. Would he be treated as the bona-fide star that he is, or would WWE pull another Colt Cabana and mishandle him horrendously? Fortunately for us, the Royal Rumble crowd took the decision out of their hands. His reaction at the Rumble was absolutely phenomenal, excuse the pun, and the E were left with no choice but to treat him like a big deal. Clearly WWE has something special on their hands, and with Bryan’s sad retirement, Styles could be the perfect guy to fill the void of ‘everyman hero.’ Expect this to be the greatest technical wrestling match of the evening, and for Styles to pick up the win he needs and deserves. Anything else would be, frankly, stupid…then again, this is the WWE (here’s looking at you, Reigns), so it could go either way.

Who I would book to win? – A.J Styles

Who I think will win? – A.J Styles

 

BECKY LYNCH AND SASHA BANKS VS TEAM BAD

bankslynch

Well, who saw this coming? After Lynch’s narrow loss to Charlotte via shennanigans at the Rumble, out came Banks, to an incredible reaction. She promptly dumped Lynch out of the ring, and seemingly challenged Charlotte to a championship match. Fast-forward a month, and somehow these two are a team facing Banks’ former stable, Team Bad. It’s all very confusing, and only the most naive of people out there would see this as anything other than ‘Bryan’s retirement caused them to give a sympathy title shot to his wife, Brie Bella, in order to cash in on the sentimentality. So we stuck all these girls together, because why not? ‘. Lynch and Banks will win here, I imagine, and head on to a triple threat match at ‘Mania with the champ.

Who I would book to win? – Becky Lynch and Sasha Banks

Who do I think will win? – Becky Lynch and Sasha Banks

 

THE WYATT FAMILY VS BIG SHOW, KANE AND RYBACK

The Wyatts

‘We are war, we are pestilence, we are famine, and we are death.’ We are also stuck in a pointless feud with two has-beens and a never-will-be, while we kill time before the inevitable showdown with Lesnar. This will not only be the worst match of the evening, it’s also by far the most pointless. The Wyatts deserve better, and hopefully ‘Mania will deliver. For now, they should win this. If they don’t, WWE is in serious danger of ruining the mystique of their most unique and entertaining act.

Who I would book to win? The Wyatt Family

Who will win? The Wyatt Family

 

INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPIONSHIP
(C) Kevin Owens  Vs  Dolph Ziggler

Ziggler Vs owens.jpg

As with Del Rio and Kalisto, this feels like a match we have seen hundreds of times over the last few weeks alone. So what’s different this time that warrants a Pay Per View appearance? Well, Owens is now the Intercontinental champion, I guess..so there’s that. Still, I can’t see Ziggler taking the title from Owens so soon after he won it back. I’d imagine this will be an entertaining match between two talented workers who know how to put on a fun show…but will be lacking in tension, as Owens will almost certainly win this.

Who I would book to win? Kevin Owens

Who I think will win? Kevin Owens.

 

DIVAS CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH

(C) Charlotte Vs Brie Bella

brie vs Charlotte.jpg

Now this is the times when WWE really pisses off their fanbase and insults their intelligence. Brie has been a non-factor in the Divas decision for months, and is, in all honesty, an awful wrestler. So why has she been suddenly rocketed into a championship match? Could it possibly be because her famous husband retired this month? I wouldn’t like to say. What I will say is Charlotte should win this. Brie is no D-Bry and she never will be. Unfortunately, talent cannot be sexually transmitted.

Who I would book to win? – Charlotte

Who I think will win? – Charlotte

 

NUMBER ONE CONTENDER’S TRIPLE THREAT MATCH

Brock Lesnar  Vs  Roman Reigns  Vs  Dean Ambrose

Triple threat.jpg

So the Roman Reigns experiment continues to flounder wildly, like a fish dumped out of water, so the WWE has a bright brain spark. Why not take the guy who we want to be the most popular guy in the company, despite the fans basically hating him, and stick him in a match with the two most popular guys in the entire company? That has to get him cheered, right? Now, I won’t insult your intelligence by pointing out what a stupid strategy that is, I’m sure you can figure that one out yourself. Unlike the WWE, apparently. The way they’ve booked this has also been rather weird and actually points towards an Ambrose victory. The way Ambrose and Lesnar have largely avoided Reigns in order to focus on each other has been interesting. My only fear is that it was done so the Reigns victory would be more ‘surprising’. Unfortunately, because of the last four months of booking Reigns Vs Triple H, that match would make the most sense for ‘Mania. Anything else would be odd, but better…definitely better. So who wins here? I’m gonna have to pick Reigns. I think The Wyatt’s will likely screw Brock, leaving Ambrose Vs Reigns. Reigns win. They fist bump. Reigns goes on to Mania to be boo’d on the grandest stage of them all.

Personally, I’d pick Brock, and flip the script. Something along the lines of ‘Triple H hated Reigns so much he put him up versus Lesnar knowing he couldn’t win, and then suddenly realises what he has done.’ The facial expression when Trips realises he’s facing the beast at ‘Mania, and that it’s his own damn fault, would be priceless. Can’t see it happening though.

 

Who I would book to win? – Brock Lesnar

Who will win? – Roman fucking Reigns.

 

Royal Rumble Review

 

Royal Rumble

Last night WWE kicked off the traditional road-to-Wrestlemania in style with The Royal Rumble 2016. After the last two Rumble events flopped miserably and caused more of a fan backlash than if Cannibal Corpse dropped an R’n’B album with Lil’ Wayne, WWE knew they simply had to get it right this time. With ratings at an all-time low and most considering the current product had basically become ‘Roman Reigns and friends’. I’m very glad to say that, my initial reaction at least is very positive, and I hugely enjoyed this year’s edition. Now, without further ado, on to the card itself.

McMahon Opening Promo

The show kicked off with a small promo featuring the McMahons, looking all happy because they had this one ‘in the bag’ and nothing could spoil their plans. The segment was, thankfully, very short and did its job relatively well. It reminded us that Mr.McMahon is an evil corporate bellend, in case we’d forgotten after being reminded every week since 1997.

Intercontinental Championship Last Man Standing Match

(C) Dean Ambrose W Vs L Kevin Owens

AMBROSE VS OWENS.jpg

Now this is how to book an opening contest! Ignoring the pre-show (As I often do) this was the official show-starter and it was a wonderful experience from bell to bell and the first major contender for match of the year. These two beat the holy hell out of each other and were continuously inventive and innovative. We had kendo sticks, a broken barracade, tables, chairs and basically everything else that the P.G era of wrestling can get away with. What impressed me most, however, was the storytelling aspect. Wrestling is a primarily story driven business, and quite often that aspect is lost in the match, but not here. Kevin Owens works the crowd like very few before him. I particularly enjoyed the part where, after Owen refused to stay down yet again, Ambrose screamed in frustration, ‘I hate you’, to which Owens responded ‘I hate you too’. Is it particularly complicated and difficult to do? Of course not. Is it done enough during matches these days? No sir, it is not. The art of storytelling in wrestling is becoming, slowly, a lost one. Not with these two. Here we have two future world champions, proving themselves on the opener. This was a fantastic contest, and a magical way to open the show. In the end, Ambrose retains after putting K.O through a painful looking double-table spot on the outside, and everyone can be happy that they just watched a potential instant-classic.

Rating – 4.7

WWE TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP

(C) The New Day W Vs L The Usos

The usos Vs New Day

Next up, it was time to not be sour, and clap your hands for your two-time world tag team champs and feel the powwwwwwweeeeeeer, it was a New Day, yes it was. Sorry, I know that was incredibly lame, but I really like The New Day. They remain firmly entrenched in that strange position of ‘annoying heels we love to cheer for’. Before the contest, we were treated to a thoroughly entertaining segment in which we were invited to mourn the loss of Francesca the trombone, brutally murdered by Chris Jericho’s knee. Suddenly, during the one-minute silence, the sound of a new trombone came blaring over the P.A, and we were introduced to Francesca 2! I have to admit, sadly, that I giggled at this like a naughty child. Do I feel ashamed? Slightly. Either way, the match was a traditional tag team affair, decently executed, with some nice back and forth action. It ended with a great spot, as Big E caught whichever Uso (I honestly find it hard to tell between them) in mid-air, and dropped him with a big ending. The catch was mightily impressive, as our The New Day as a whole, and their run continues.

Final Rating  – 3.9

BRAY WYATT PROMO

‘We are war. We are famine. We are pestilence, and we are death. We slaughtered the beast, and we destroyed your chosen one. The apocalypse begins tonight’

Once again Bray continues to deliver the best promos in the entire company, bar none, and this was no exception. Wouldn’t change a word of it, personally.

US CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH

(C) Alberto Del Rio  L  Vs  W  Kalisto  – New Champion Kalisto.

Kalisto

In terms of booking, other than the Rumble itself, this was the most fascinating match on the card. After Kalisto’s mini-push culminated in a shocking U.S Championship win over Del Rio on Raw, WWE seemingly derailed this by having him drop the championship a mere few days later, back to Del Rio, on Smackdown. The rematch was announced for The Rumble, and everybody thought, ‘Well, what now?’. If I were in charge of booking, I’d have had Del Rio retain here, tell Kalisto he’s a nobody, before Kalisto finally has his big moment in front of 100,000 people in Texas at Wrestlemania 32. Instead, we had a fairly entertaining match last night that ended in Kalisto winning back the U.S Championship, meaning the title has changed hands three times in a matter of weeks. This is an example of WWE’s ‘Clusterfucker panic-booking’ and leaves us unsure as to where this story can actually head from here. Overall, a decent match with a few noticeable mistakes by Kalisto that ended in a very questionable booking decision.

Rating – 3.4

DIVAS CHAMPIONSHIP

(C) Charlotte  W  Vs  L  Becky Lynch

Charlotte Vs Lynch

We all feared for the diva’s revolution after the insanely erratic booking of the Summer. Could WWE deliver on their promise to legitimise female wrestling? Could they continue to put the performers across as threats and resist sexist storylines and turning them into jokes? The answer, at the start of this match, seemed a resounding ‘YES!’ as the match was given a big-fight feel with proper in-ring introductions, the type they typically reserve for World Championship matches. The match then proceeded to be really rather good, if never great, as everybody had an eye on the clock knowing The Rumble was on its merry way. Then we had THAT Ric Flair spot that disturbed everyone, before Charlotte wins via shenanigans. The booking was fine, Charlotte should be the bad-girl champion heading into Wrestlemania, but the use of a sixty-plus year old man kissing a competitor to distract her was….worrying. It’s basically sexual assault, and it was played off for laughs. Again, WWE shoots itself in the foot, and again it continues to have a split-personality in terms of the diva’s division. The ending was then saved by Sasha Banks coming out, declaring herself the next challenger to the championship, and the crowd went absolutely mad. Sasha Vs Charlotte is money, and WWE have pulled a master stroke in setting that up early, and in terms saved this contest and caused everyone to temporarily forget the whole casual sexual assault angle.

Overall rating – 4.3

 

THE ROYAL RUMBLE MATCH

(C) Roman Reigns Vs Everybody.

Winner, and new WWE Champion – Triple H

Triple H wins Rumble

 

Finally, FINALLY the WWE has booked a decent Royal Rumble, if ya smell what Trips is cookin’. After the last two Rumbles ended in boos and hatred, and are considered the lowest points in WWE’s recent history, they knew they had to do something different this year. Again, they were pushing Roman Reigns, and having him enter number one, the fans knew they were going to see a lot of him. They had one hope, and one hope alone, that he would not win the contest again. Luckily, for them, he actually didn’t and everybody went home happy. Sort of.

Reigns started off quickly, dispatching number 2 Rusev in prompt fashion. The buzzer hit for number 3, and out came FUCKING A.J STYLES. The crowd went ballistic, and A.J and Reigns had a mini tussle before 4 entered. The match then simmered down and went a bit quiet, with the traditional parade of mid-carders and occasional eliminations of nobodies, until The Wyatts began to take control of the match.

Around this point, Reigns was attacked by McMahon’s cronies, and led out on a stretcher. Everybody collectively groaned. We know he’s going to come back, we’ve seen this story over a thousand times before. All it did was allow the focus to come off of Reigns for a while, as the Wyatt’s dominated everyone….until out come Brock Lesnar. What happened next was pure poetry, and Lesnar basically destroyed anything he came into contact with, eventually eliminating every Wyatt member. Then Bray came out, and we all stopped to consider this dynamic. His family, his helpers, had been eliminated before he even entered the match. What we he do now? Simple, the Royal Rumble is a no D.Q match, remember, so the Wyatts simply came back in and between the four of them they shockingly eliminated Lesnar. This was huge and I was genuinely stunned by Lesnar’s early exit. Bray then dominated for a bit, before Reigns made his triumphant return. The match continued as normal, then number 30 hit….AND OUT CAME TRIPLE H. Safe to say, the crowd went absolutely bonkers for the returning Game, as very few of them would have thought the WWE had the balls to pull this off. The rumble continued, everybody was eliminated, before Trips shockingly threw out Reigns and came down to a one on one with Dean Ambrose.

Now, considering Ambrose had been in a hellatious last man standing match earlier, the amount of time he spent in the rumble match means he deserves a special mention for his efforts. However, he’d come up short, as The Game would capture his 14th World Heavyweight Championship. Now, a lot of people are pissed at this, for pretty obvious reasons. Trips has a long history of politicking his way to titles, and rewarding himself at this point over the younger talent could be considered another ego boost. Now, when we remember that he’s gone seven years without holding this championship, and that this move is to further a storyline as opposed to performing his usual self-fellatio, I think we can excuse it. Besides, at least it wasn’t Roman, right? RIGHT?

Final Rating – 4.9/5

So the 2016 Royal Rumble has been and gone. We had some great moments, like The Last Man Standing Match, and at least two iconic moments (The Game returns to win the championship, A.J Styles debut), and every match on the card was good to great. The Divas match could have done without the whole sexual assault angle, but we can’t win them all. For the first time in three years I’d wholeheartedly recommend this event to a friend, and I actually think, as a structured match, The Rumble was the best since Austin’s win in 2001. Does the fact that Triple H won reiterate the idea that WWE is failing to build new megastars and have to continuously rely on part-timers? Perhaps. I’d be more convinced if half the roster wasn’t unfortunately injured. Overall, a great show, and a damn fine way to kick off 2016. Bray Wyatt came out looking like a beast again. And, considering the unfortunate passing of Motorhead’s Lemmy, seeing ‘The Game’ blasting over the P.A as Trips raises the belt was a nice tribute, if you look at it that way.

Overall Show Rating – 4.4

 

Joshua Moulinie.

Moulinie’s WWE Awards 2015

Now, let us make one thing clear, right out from the start. This is a fledgling blog space, a space for all to talk about anything they hold dear to their heart. Whilst this will predominantly be based around Film and the various other arts, I am in no way pretentious enough to discredit the beautifully weird blending of theatrics and athletics that can only happen in one place on earth. That place is the magical entertainment form known as professional wrestling. Since my youth, and the days of Stone Cold Steve Austin and The Rock battling in a bloodbath at Wrestlemania 17, I have been a hooked and avid fan. Has the quality waned over the years? Of course. Does this stop me watching? For some reason, against all logic and reason, apparently not. So, without further ado, I bring to you, my best of for WWE in the year 2015!

SUPERSTAR OF THE YEAR (The biggy, the one they all want):

The Contenders:

  • Seth Rollins
  • Brock Lesnar
  • The Undertaker
  • John Cena
  • Bayley

The Winner is………….

SETH

SETH ROLLINS!

Who else? Seth not only was involved in a match of the year candidate against Lesnar and Cena at The Rumble, but he then went on to become the first person to ever cash in his money in the bank in the main event of Wrestlemania to rob both Brock and Roman Reigns of the WWE Championship. I never thought the WWE would have the balls to pull of such a huge move, in an event as large and prestigious as ‘Mania, but they did, and it came off. Despite being saddled afterwards with poor feuds and questionable booking, Rollins somehow managed to pull everything off, remaining the most entertaining part of the show for the best part of the year. Unfortunately, due to a destroyed ALC, we won’t be seeing Seth for a while, and we’ll never know quite how long he would have reigned as champ. However, for me, 2015 will forever be Seth’s year. And boy, oh boy, do we miss him now.

 

FEUD OF THE YEAR (The art that wrestling is built on)

The Contenders:

  • Seth Rollins Vs John Cena
  • Brock Lesnar Vs The Undertaker
  • Dean Ambrose Vs Seth Rollins
  • Kevin Owens Vs John Cena
  • Sting Vs Triple H

And the winner is……

undertaker brock

Brock Lesnar Vs The Undertaker!

In the jaded days of Wrestling, when we are firmly stuck in the PG era of child friendly gimmicks and not crossing the line, the WWE finally gave us an old school feud. Picture this; it’s Battleground, it’s the main event. Brock is systematically dismantling poor Seth to the adoration of a screaming crowd. One more devastating F-5 (And boy did it look devastating, Seth is a small athletic guy and he sold it like a champ) and Brock goes for the cover. Then the lights go out. At this point, me and my then-girlfriend both sat up, at the edge of our seats. We knew what was coming, The Deadman was back! But then he did something decidedly unlike the immortal ass-kicker we all loved. He kicked Brock square in his Lesnars, before laying him out with a Tombstone. Did ‘Taker just turn heel? Was he a bad guy? With this swift kicking in the nuts, everything we knew about the line between good and bad was broken, and thus the year’s greatest feud was born.
If the start of the feud was fantastic, the next night really elevated it. In case we wondered why ‘Taker waited a full 15 months before exacting his revenge for the end of the streak, he spelled it out in no uncertain terms. It wasn’t that Brock beat him, as ‘Taker said, all legends must finally fall. Rather, it was that he wouldn’t shut up about it. It added an interesting and human dynamic to The Undertaker that we’d rarely seen before, whilst retaining the vengeful ass kicker image he’d always held.                                                                A full-out brawl broke out between the two, the likes of which we haven’t seen in years. What these two bring to the table, that most in today’s PG product fail too, is that sense of legitimacy. This didn’t come off as the usually embarrassingly poorly choreographed scuffle, rather, this looked like two legitimate monsters colliding. ‘I’m gonna kill you!’ Screamed Brock (again, destroying the line of PG), before the Undertaker replied, perfectly ‘You’re gonna have to’. Forget that this was wrestling for a minute, that was fantastic writing. And with it, and the ensuing fists, the stage was set for a ‘Mania rematch at SummerSlam, and then the feud took an even more controversial turn.                                        After a brutal back and forth match between the behemoths, Brock caught ‘Taker in his famed Kamura lock. Suddenly, before the referee had seemingly made a gesture, the timekeeper rang the bell. In the midst of the confusion, ‘Taker took another shot at Lesnar’s crown jewels, before locking in a choke that caused a defiant Lesnar to pass out, rather than tap, flipping ‘Taker the bird and all. This huge and controversial feud just got more interesting, especially when we discovered that ‘Taker had indeed tapped, the referee just hadn’t seen it, and the timekeeper ‘jumped the gun’. ‘Taker won, but it was far from conclusive, and thus the two agreed to meet one last time in the devil’s playground, for hell in a cell. And that was where Brock finally pinned ‘Taker, without shennanigans, after a fantastic fued that had been over 19 months in the making. This is storytelling seemingly long forgotten by WWE, and a reminder of why we watch in the first place. For me, there was simply no other choice.

 

MATCH OF THE YEAR (The moment we got our money’s worth)

The Contenders:

  • WWE Championship – Brock Lesnar Vs John Cena Vs Seth Rollins (Royal Rumble)
  • Daniel Bryan Vs Roman Reigns (Fast Lane)
  • John Cena Vs Kevin Owens (Money In The Bank)
  • U.S/WWE Championship – John Cena Vs Seth Rollins (SummerSlam)
  • Hell In A Cell Match, Brock Lesnar Vs The Undertaker (Hell In A Cell)

And the winner is……

Taker Vs Lesnar

The Undertaker Vs Brock Lesnar (Hell In A Cell)!:

Whilst handing two of the small handful awards available in the oh-so-prestigious Moulinie’s to two part-time wrestlers may seem almost sacrilegious, or, in some way offensive to the full-timers who put on a plethora of wonderful athletic contests this year, there was only ever going to be one winner. As a child my memories of hell in a cell were brutal. Absolutely barbaric. Blood would flow, bodies would break, Mick Foley usually tried to kill himself in some innovative way, but as the PG era broke in, all this was lost. My memories of Hell in A Cell became that of watered down contests, with blood an impossibility, as the slightest sight of crimson and the doc traditionally shuts things down. I thought the days of brutal hell in a cell contests, contests during which I often suspended my disbelief and genuinely feared for the safety of the competitors was over, but then this happened. This match had it all, and for those who haven’t seen it, I’m not going to ruin a goddamn thing. All I’ll say is this, it had everything you wanted; Suplexes, ‘Taker being badass, bloodshed (by both), a doctor cruelly thrown out of the ring, and even the damn ring mat being removed. This was a brutal battle during which nobody could care less who won. This was wrestling at it’s finest, a spectacle, an event, a big moment that you feel like you’ve been apart of something huge merely by witnessing. This reminded me that wrestling can still be great, and for this I am ever thankful. Forget match of the year, this is match of the decade.

BREAKTHROUGH SUPERSTAR OF THE YEAR (The guy who made an impact)

The Contenders:

  • Neville
  • Kevin Owens
  • Kalisto
  • Charlotte
  • Sasha Banks

And the winner is……

 

KO

Kevin Owens!:

After winning the NXT championship (WWE’s developmental title, for those who don’t know) in record time big things were expected from Kevin Owens, and it was clear they had high hopes the Candadian indie favourite. These hopes were elevated to previously unfathomable levels when he beat John Cena clean on his Pay-Per-View debut at Money In The Bank. Let me repeat that, for those who can’t quite believe it. Kevin Owens beat John Cena live on Pay Per View without shennanigans. That, simply put, is about as statistically likely as Donald Trump marrying a Mexican, and yet, somehow, it happened. Now, regardless of the fact that K.O kinda fizzled out towards the end of the year, and had a pretty mediocre Intercontinental Championship reign, as well as a relatively boring feud with Dean Ambrose, the magnitude of his achievement cannot be understated. He beat the face of the company fairly in the middle of the ring on his debut. Other than winning the WWE Championship your first night, I highly doubt that could ever be topped.

 

TAG TEAM/STABLE OF THE YEAR: (The team we loved the most)

The Contenders:

  • The New Day
  • The Wyatt Family
  • The Usos
  • The Lucha Dragons
  • The League of Nations

 

And the winner is…..

THENEWDAY

The New Day! (Yes it is):

Awwwwwwwww don’t you dare be sour, clap for your two time world famous tag champs, and feel the powwwweeeeeeeeeer. It’s The New Day winning, yes it is. Starting out as a poorly received face act that got over with absolutely nobody, New Day took their ridiculous gimmick, made it somehow more ridiculous before, and then got themselves over in a way that absolutely nobody could have seen coming. Two time champs and a guaranteed promo on RAW, as well as PPV performances the year out. New Day are now one of WWE’s most popular acts, and I can see them lasting some time yet.

 

FEMALE SUPERSTAR OF THE YEAR: (The best of the fairer sex)

The Contenders:

  • Bayley
  • Charlotte
  • Paige
  • Becky Lynch
  • Sasha Banks

 

And the winner is…….

Bayley

Bayley:

I know what you’re thinking…how did the one female to not be promoted to the main roster win female of the year? Surely those who were deemed worthy of elevation ahead of her must be her superior? Well, maybe, but if you paid attention to the opening category (Superstar of the year) you’d have seen that Bayley is the only female name among the contenders. In one year she went from being a comic relief character to the most over female on NXT, and, quite possibly, the most over wrestler on the product itself. In fact, one could make a strong argument that after Daniel Bryan and Brock Lesnar, that she is the most over wrestler in the entire company. This is not in spite of the fact that she is as yet overlooked for a call-up to ‘the big leagues’, it is in fact because of it. Whilst the rest of her famous ‘four horsewomen’ were lost in the shuffle on RAW, as nine females effectively fought for two spots, Bayley became NXT champion and carried an entire brand on her shoulders. She is the biggest star female wrestling has right now, and nobody deserves this reward more.

 

Biggest moment of the year (the time you went ‘holy shit’)

The Contenders:

  • The Rock and Reigns get boo’d at The Royal Rumble
  • Seth Rollins cashes in at Wrestlemania 31
  • Kevin Owens beats Cena clean at Money in The Bank
  • The Undertaker kicks Brock in the nuts at Battleground
  • Sting almost dies at Night of Champions

 

And the winner is……..

Sting

Sting almost dies at Night of Champions!

Now, it’s terribly sad that such a celebratory article has to end on such a sombre note, but there was simply no other moment this year that made me feel quite like this did. Seth’s cash in was a wonderful feel-good moment, sure, and it was shocking, but not like this. This image above was not supposed to happen. During a match with Seth Rollins for the WWE championship, fifty-seven year old Sting took several dangerous spots. One involving being driven through an unprepared announce table, and the rest involved being powerbombed into a turnbuckle. Multiple times. During the match, as Sting went to deliver a trademark good-guy come back, he mysteriously collapsed. After years of wrestling, I had become conditioned to knowing where the lines between reality and fiction are blurred, and I knew instantly something was wrong. Eventually, he got up, but the rest of the match was a shambles and it’s clear Seth had to carry Sting through to the sloppy finish. It was, to say the least, uncomfortable and only after did Sting reveal the extent of his injuries. He lost all feeling in his arm, temporary consciousness, and was several inches away from a permanently paralysing spinal injury. Yet, despite this, he got back up, at fifty seven, and finished the match. What a fucking hero. So, next time you say ‘wrestling is fake’ in a deragotory sense, remember this. Steve Borden, a fifty-seven year old man, almost killed himself from your entertainment, playing a ‘fake’ character called Sting.

Well, I sure hope you enjoyed this article. If so, feel free to look around the blog for more fun things to read, which, eventually, there will be!

Joshua Moulinie.